Christmas time is a big milestone in our annual calendars. It’s a time for merry-making and fun festivities but it’s also the one-week precursor to the new year. With that tends to bring about ideas of turning over a new leaf, starting afresh and making changes and big decisions about our lives for the new year ahead. Australian artist and author Elizabeth Jane is no stranger to change and after a painful divorce, now acts as a leading light for men and women who are on the path to making a change in their lives for the better.
“People fear change because the outcome of change is unknown. As humans, we like the stability and peace of knowing things, but if we don’t know what will happen, we get worried and some of us have active imaginations that can churn out potential scenarios that may or may never eventuate,” said Jane, whose first book, ‘Free and First – Unlocking Your Ultimate Life’ hit the Amazon best seller in the debut books category.
Jane has not only become a sought-after author and advocate for positive personal growth, she has also quickly established herself as a much-loved artist, painting a number of stunning collections on canvas.
“Part of my role as a personal growth advocate for men and women undergoing transformation and change due to life challenges and difficulties, is to serve as a beacon of hope for the joy and fulfilment they can achieve by focusing on themselves and their needs and aspirations,” Jane said.
“This Christmas whether intended or not, many people will face change and this will be a very difficult and confronting time for them, but my message to them is simple – be prepared and have the tools and support you need to embrace the future and use it to build strength and a pathway forward.”
Jane has outlined her top five tips to help people this Christmas.
1. Change is challenging
“Recognise that change is challenging. We are creatures of habit and comfort. We seek solace in the security of routines. Change requires us to break away from these old patterns and do something different even though our brains are perceiving it as a threat. Uncertainty bias is how your brain automatically sees change as a negative thing and it can make an impact on how you deal with it,” Jane explained.
“It’s natural to react to change with increased feelings of anxiety and even depression. However, recognising that change is hard is important, which can help you take the steps necessary to cope. Ask for help from people you love and trust, and pace yourself. You don’t have to make a huge change overnight, plan it out and go at a pace that’s comfortable for you.”
2. Change can be stressful
“When our routines are disrupted, we can get stressed and it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. Stress can manifest itself in different ways such as changes in appetite, problems with sleeping and getting tension headaches. Find ways that are meaningful to you that will help you cope with the stress. This will make you more resilient against it and you’ll feel like you have a better grip on how things are going for you,” Jane added.
“What are the things you can do to cope with stress? Some of the more common stress coping activities people engage in are exercise, meditation and yoga and listening to music. I definitely encourage you to find what works for you but another big tip I have is to limit your news and social media during times of stress. Turn it all off. The real world awaits.”
3. Change can be painful
“Life throws us some really hard and painful curveballs. I’ve been through the pain of a divorce so I know that change can be really painful. How to deal with the pain of change is to try to understand why it’s happening and try to accept that it’s necessary. Take small steps forward when change is hard and very importantly, celebrate your successes along the way, no matter how small they are,” Jane said.
“With change, you’ll inevitably encounter some setbacks. Know to expect these setbacks but don’t give up. Surround yourself with family and friends who understand you and can be there to support you and keep you busy
4. Learning to deal with setbacks
“Remember when you were a kid and you tried really hard but you still didn’t make it? Maybe you really wanted to make the basketball team but you didn’t get chosen. Setbacks were tough to handle as a kid, and they are even tougher to handle as adults because we’re conditioned towards success. Building resilience is very important,” Jane said.
“Setbacks are part of life. As an adult, the consequences of setbacks are often much steeper than little childhood setbacks. What can you do? Take good care of yourself is the first thing. But also, have a positive attitude, use the opportunity to learn and grow. If you messed up, take responsibility for it. Walking is one of the most important activities I can recommend. It is possible to solve many things simply by walking. It moves the body, clears the mind and brings ideas and new perspectives.”
5. Look for new opportunities
“Change is all about making a difference, so look for new opportunities in life as though you’re job hunting and actively seek out the different possibilities. You’ll build resilience, develop new ideas and perspectives and you will become more flexible in how you view changes and challenges,” Jane said.
“Out with the old and in with the new. When you’ve come to a big life upheaval, use it as an opportunity to rid yourself with some of your old habits that have been bogging you down. Is there something that’s burdensome and weighing you down? Bite the bullet, step away from it and break free of it. Embrace the new change and go forward with it. Change up your wardrobe, sell items you no longer want, upcycle items around the house you don’t need, start reading new books.”
Why change is good
“As creatures of habit, the fear of the unknown may cause us to stick to an old habit out of comfort and convenience. However, change could be exactly what we need to get us out of a difficult position in life. We can break free of old habits and form new and better habits. With change brings new opportunities and new connections, it helps us move forward and helps you discover a part of you that you probably didn’t even know existed,” Jane said.
“My book ‘Free and First – Unlocking Your Ultimate Life’ has helped many people to deal with upheavals in their past and make meaningful changes for their futures. It’s a toolkit to help you unlock your future. It’s my wish to help people so that they feel empowered to take control of their lives for the better.”
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