Bryan Hartas is one of the Forgotten Australians … but it was not always so. Until the age of seven he was loved and cared for by his mother, Alice Jean Ferguson. Bryan’s life changed when his father beat his mother so badly that she was taken away in an ambulance. She never returned.
Bryan’s happy life was changed forever. He was put into state care where he suffered horrific ongoing abuse. What he lived through should never be repeated. Like many Forgotten Australians Bryan had difficulty with literacy but by participating in writing classes at Lotus Place he was able to tell his story to the author, editor and friend, the lovely and kind Edwina Shaw. Hard As is that story.
Sadly Bryan passed away before the launch of his story, but as he lay sick in hospital he held a copy of the completed book in his hands. This publication is a testament to the human spirit, to a child’s love for his mother, and the capacity of the heart to rise and rise again. Hard As was published by AndAlso Books and was made possible by Lotus Place, Micah Projects and the Alliance for Forgotten Australians.
This book is not an easy read but it is an important one. As a mother my heart was breaking for Bryan. How different his life would have been if she’d lived and escaped the cycle of abuse. At the end of the book Bryan imagines just that.
Instead Bryan and his brothers were sent to Neerkol, an infamous orphanage west of Rockhampton. He knew he was in trouble from the first day when he saw kids digging in the dirt and eating roots of small weeds. Here they separated the brothers, who were never allowed to talk. They were fed on watery stew and stale bread and were given old clothes too big to wear. The nuns beat them regularly.
Children regularly had bones broken and went missing never to be seen again. They worked hard and were so hungry it was hard to concentrate at school. Bryan was beaten for being left handed. It was at this time Bryan was labelled a “dunce” and he never believed he could or was given the opportunity to learn.
The orphanage began sending children out to farms as free labour. Bryan was sent to the Stewarts who were kind, gave him his own room, plenty of food and where he was treated like family. These were one of the happiest times of his life. He stayed for a year until they sadly sold the farm. It was back to Neerkol where they didn’t even give him a bed.
The next few farms he was shipped to were awful and Bryan was badly mistreated and injured. He never saw a cent for all the work he was doing. He and another boy decided to leave but they were apprehended and sent to a place which made Neerkol seem like a summer camp – the infamous Westbrook.
Westbrook was a farm home for boys, a youth detention centre. Bryan was sent there because he was a neglected boy, not because he had committed a crime. This place was tough and if you weren’t tough when you got there you soon developed a hard shell for protection. In Westbrook boys scored the trifecta of physical, emotional and sexual abuse. It took two mass breakouts before there was an inquiry into the place but before then those who’d tried to escape were sent to…Boggo Road Jail. Bryan was one of these inmates. He was only sixteen.
In jail Bryan received the most clothes he’d ever owned and the first proper meals he’d had in years. He had a mattress and eventually a cell of his own. He loved jail and for the first time in a long time he felt safe. He made friends and got into amateur boxing. He was so happy there he never wanted to leave.
Bryan said, “ Jail was a beautiful place. It felt like home.”
Once he was released he had nowhere to go. He began sleeping rough and before long he broke into a shop. He was sent back to jail for three years and was so happy. Once out Bryan hit the road, doing odd jobs and farm work for food and board. He slept a lot in his car.
As he headed towards Townsville he knew where he was going. He found the street where his Grandma lived but it was bittersweet. She was blind and deaf and although she offered him a place to stay Bryan slept in his car. He visited the home he’d grown up in and finally his mother’s grave where there was no headstone. He felt his extended family just wanted him gone.
He went in search of his father but was disappointed to find he was still a violent drunk. Bryan eventually met a lady in Brisbane and had two children of his own. It didn’t turn out in the end but Bryan was very grateful to have had his kids. Bryan went on not have two more sons, Michael, who he raised on his own, then Brandon. Bryan at last had family who loved him and stuck up for him. His kids were his greatest joy.
Finally, Bryan’s life changed for the better when he discovered Lotus Place. He found support and started to feel better in himself. He made friends and learnt a lot. He met with other Forgotten Australians who had decided to put the bad things behind them and just get on with life.
He says, “ I’ve learnt that we are all human beings and we’ve got to get on in this life together, whether you’re ugly, fat or stupid. Try to help each other the best you can. If someone’s down – don’t kick them help them up. You never know how much someone’s been through.”
It’s good to know Bryan found a modicum of peace before he passed on. His mother’s grave now has a headstone and Bryan’s legacy is in store. A story which needs to be told so that others don’t endure the same fate. Sadly there are still children facing the fallout from domestic violence and family breakdown. More always needs to be done to help the most innocent and vulnerable members of our society.
Hard As – My Life As An Orphan Boy is available now. To celebrate this poignant story Kristina Olsson is hosting an event at Avid Reader at 6pm for 6:30 on November 21. Kristina has written Boy, Lost which tells of the life of her brother who is also a Forgotten Australian. There will be music, story, discussion and song where you can witness the healing power of story at work. Friends will share Bryan’s legacy and discuss the importance of recording and sharing difficult stories by Forgotten Australians.
CEO of Micah Projects, Karyn Walsh will be speaking, as will Katie McGuire who organised the project at Lotus Place. Bryan would be pleased to know his best friend Sherryl will speak along with his writing mentor and editor, Edwina Shaw. If you can’t make it in person you can watch this special celebration of Bryan’s resilience, life, courage and wisdom via Zoom. I think Bryan will be looking down with pride at all those who helped in making his story dream come to life.
Michelle Beesley is a Brisbane born and bred former primary school teacher. A wife, proud grandma and mother of three grown sons, Michelle is thrilled to have recently published her debut contemporary romance novel, It Happened in Paris, with Serenade Publishing. Her novella – Escape to D’ Amour was published in 2019. Michelle’s work can be found in the anthologies – Destination Romance and Short & Sweet. When not reading or writing Michelle can be found at a coffee shop chatting with friends, front row at a fashion show, or beside a rugby union field cheering on her favourite teams.
Michelle is a reluctant traveller, Francophile, keen walker and avid yoga enthusiast plus a book, film and theatre lover who loves everything pink and sparkly (including champagne). You can find Michelle on instagram @michellebeesley_writer and her website: michellebeesley.com.
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