motherhood: the state of being a mother. – quoted by a google search,
Yes, it’s a state. firstly a state of shock that you have o actually now look after someone. A state of exhaustion, patience you never had before but let’s face it is just the beginning. When I get pushed to the limit of the state I look into my mirror do a power pose and think “you’ve got this”.
Entering into motherhood is a very painful stage, it can last hours and then once you feel like you can’t go on anymore, all of a sudden you are looking at this squashed beautiful little person. Enjoy those moments, it’s the only time they will probably have a solid stretch of sleep for months, don’t even worry about the 4 month sleep regression, it’s more like a year of no sleep. Once you realise the amount you can do in a 45 minute window and it will be a positive outlook and your life will change forever. My 6 year old still can’t sleep through the night!
In saying that the first one is difficult for many reasons mainly because every relationship around you changes and its the adjustment that can do with it that make it even more challenging. Once you manage the juggle it will get easier and you get to enjoy this beautiful little person who gets to fit into your life for the journey too.
I used to try and fit in with my childless friends but it just got too hard and by the end I think I was just forgotten, this is why the first is hard – everything changes.
By the time I had my third baby in 4 years I was deep in the mothering vortex and my brain resembled a dropped watermelon. It was slightly difficult to leave the house with all three: let alone go to the toilet and the only thing that was getting a workout was my change table. The only things that got me through was good coffee, concealer and an eye cream – one also with caffeine.
Now fast forward nearly two years I’m slowing starting to regain life (for the first time in SIX YEARS I was not pregnant or breast-feeding this Christmas / New Years) and able to watch and observe the mum culture, it’s very interesting.
To all the new mums out there, I see you getting your precious bundle out of the car into a pram in the time it takes me to get three into a double pram, it will get easier. I also applaud you for small wins like a public breastfeed. It’s not that bad!
To the Mumma’s wrangling a toddlers tantrum like a crocodile hunter, don’t worry – it doesn’t seem that bad to us who are in close proximity.
To the school mums who someone appear floating across the school ground with there sh** together, I admire you! I’m rocking up in flares, messy hair and probably lost my child. My question is how do you do this?
Another point which has got me thinking, when I was younger and didn’t have children I actually left the house after 7. I would probably consume too many beers and have random conversations, but we all used to support each other and tell each other how good we looked! Now, as boring mothers in our late twenties / early thirties why are we not pouring praise into each other rather than giving bad advice and suggesting horrible sleeping books? I remember one mum at Kindy commenting that I was super mum for carrying a baby and a massive 2 year old, instead of that why don’t you help me out and grab my 4 yr old! If this was the drunken toilet sisterhood you would have helped me for sure.
So if you are reading this and your thinking of a mumma mate send them a text to let them know your thinking of them, or even better CALL THEM! it might be what they need to get through a day of nappy changes, preparing food and keeping small children safe.